A year ago today, we had an open house in our old house in Washington. We were so hopeful that it would sell soon and we could move on with our lives. Of course that didn’t happen, but it did sell and we did move on with our lives. But it seems like years ago rather than a year ago. So much has happened in one, short year, it’s amazing that all of that could fit into such a short time. Like, we’ve only been in this house for about six months, but it seems like we’ve been here much longer. Funny how time works that way… Anyway, it was just last year that we were getting ready to move away from WA and I honestly cannot remember if Doug had gotten his job with Mr. Owl yet or not, but I know he was already making plans to move out here because I had a Facespace post about the difficulties of finding a hotel room in Albuquerque during the International Balloon Fiesta. I didn’t come out until the first week of October, though I’d planned on coming out in December originally. Plans change pretty quickly sometimes. I wonder though, dear reader, if the weirdness with our neighbor might not have happened had I stayed? Put coulda, woulda, and shoulda in one hand and a quarter in the other and whatdya got? Twenty-five cents.
I guess a lot of you don’t know what went down with our crazy neighbor. Well, since it’s all said and done, I guess I can go into it a little bit. See, the county found out we were selling our house and put in an offer since they want to buy up any properties going up for sale in that neighborhood for flood control. We were all, “Sure, so long as they pay the asking price.” Which they did. Like, it was no skin off our nose if the county bought our property. Anyway, it turns out that our neighbor (we only had one, really) had been encroaching on our property over the few years we lived there and the county couldn’t, by law, purchase it until they did one of two things – get their crap off of the property or sign an easement. The easement gave them complete use of the encroachment so far as the county was concerned. So basically they were getting free land. T— signed it, no problem, but E—… well… she wouldn’t sign it. For reasons.
Not only would she not sign it, but she lied and said she was in Alaska taking care of her sick father. Like my realtors (bless their hearts) made all kinds of arrangements to have people find her to have her sign and notarize the papers. She lied about being in Alaska. T— lied about not being able to reach her. They both lied about her being back in Washington but being somewhere in Issaquah, or something. Anyway, they led our realtors — who did a great job by the way, they were real troopers about this whole thing. I did try to warn them though. Like, as soon as this came up, I said, E— is gonna fuck with you. She’s crazy. And they were all: “Nah, we know them, our kids are on the same wrestling team.” and I was like: Don’t say I didn’t warn you. And at the end, they acknowledged that I did, indeed, warn them. But anyway, they led our realtors on a merry chase for about… four months and King County was all, “What’s going on with these neighbors?” And in the meantime, we were hemorrhaging money living at the hotel so I said, “Let’s hire a lawyer and threaten to sue them.” Doug really didn’t want to go that route because he’s not a confrontational person, and it costs money to hire a lawyer, but it was costing us a lot more to NOT hire one.
So we did. We hired a lawyer and threatened to sue their happy asses. And wouldn’t you know? They found E—. She was right there, behind the couch (joke). The next day, she was at the notary ready to sign the papers and get them notarized and everything. It was a miracle! No one was more shocked than I at how quickly she appeared. Shocked I was, shocked and amazed. Truly. Strange how neatly it all worked out when a strongly worded letter from an attorney appeared in their mailbox threatening to sue them for a half a million dollars. And believe me, dear reader, we would have done it too. I was tired of her tomfoolery. In the end though, her shenanigans cost us a pretty penny: six months in a hotel room instead of, at the most two. We had an offer on a house in December and we couldn’t get funded because she was dicking around. Three months of our house in WA sitting empty with an offer on the table from the county. The money for the sale of house was sitting and waiting for us by the end of December. E— didn’t sign the papers until the end of March. And we paid about $1,200 in lawyer’s fees — for writing the letter and delivering the papers to the realtor. Not to mention all the money we lost in storage fees because our stuff sat there for about six months. We shoulda sued them anyway. But that’s neither here nor there.
But in the end, it kind of worked out because we’re in a house that Doug really likes. Last time we bought a house, we bought one that I really liked. This time we went with his preference. Don’t get me wrong. I like this house. It’s a nice house. But it’s way too big for my personal taste. I’m more of a cottage type person. If it were just me, I’d live in a studio apartment, or a one-room house, or something. Like small. Not tiny house small — that’s just being trendy. But as I said, cottage-like. I’m okay with this place so long as Doug’s around, but I would have never picked it out for myself. He knows this too. It’s something we talked about a lot when we were looking at houses — the difference in our preferences. Anyway, this house came on the market four days before I saw it, and we bid on it pretty quickly. So if it weren’t for E— and her madness, we would be in a different place. Would we be as happy as we are now? Well, who can say? But we’re here now and that’s the way the world turned.